Don't Let Fear Guide You

Earlier this year I spent a lot of time deciding whether I should do Arabic during the spring and summer to come to Jordan this fall (the fast track), or to wait and do things the normal way, coming next fall.  One of the things that worried me about doing the fast track was that I wouldn't know very many of the other students.  Most of them had been taking Arabic together for two years, and they had been in a lot of other classes together.  I had been in classes with some of them, but I didn't know any of them very well.  I was a little worried I wouldn't have many good friends in the program.  But despite my worries, I decided to do the fast track.

My spring and summer Arabic classes were small--six to ten students, all of whom were planning on going to Jordan this fall.  That was good for me because I do a lot better, socially-speaking, in smaller groups.  I was pleasantly surprised by how quickly the class "clicked."  We got along really well, and I made some good friends.  I even met a couple of the others in our study abroad group, but I was still worried about the thirty others that I didn't know who would be on the same study abroad program.

Since arriving here, I have gotten to know a lot of the other students much better.  It has been intimidating at times, since they are all such good friends already, but knowing the small group from spring/summer has given me a foundation, and things have gone well since then.  Today someone brought cake to class for my birthday, several people wished me happy birthday, and a roommate bought me a Jordanian dessert.  Yesterday I walked into a classroom smiling (I had been talking to or joking around with another student in the hall), and one of my classmates said "Nick, are you ever not smiling?"  (I've changed a bit since elementary school I guess.)

I'm not saying these things to brag or anything; I'm just trying to make a point.  Imagine if I had let my fears stop me from going through with my plan.  I would be missing out on all of these experiences.  I'm glad I didn't let my fears stop me.  I think that's an important lesson, and one I'm still learning.  I can't let fear of failure stop me from pursuing a career, or any course of action that might seem intimidating.  So learn now what it took me years to realize!  No fear!