Political Parties

Sometimes it is easy to become disillusioned with political parties.  At least at present, they are very polarized.  It seems there is little push for compromise.  Often it seems that politicians are more concerned about winning and beating the other guys than about doing a good job of running the country, state, or whatever body they are elected to.  But this speech given by BYU political science professor David Magleby a few weeks ago talks about why parties are important in American politics.  Though I still get frustrated with the actions of some politicians, it is important to remember that we have a system that works.

Some Thoughts on Mothers

Here are some thoughts I wrote down during sacrament meeting today, partially inspired by one of the talks:

Heavenly Father may have warned, when He asked "Whom shall I send?" that it would not be easy, that it would require pain and sacrifice, but that it would save souls and bring true and everlasting joy to God's children.  Christ said "Here am I; send me."  But He was not alone.  What mother has not volunteered to do the same?  Though none can replace or replicate what the Savior did, few parallel His actions as closely as mothers do.  Being a mother is not easy.  Mothers sacrifice themselves physically--pregnancy and childbirth take a toll on the body.  Mothers put their lives on the line to bring God's children into mortality.  They sacrifice their time; they sacrifice pursuing their own interests and developing their own talents.  They are instrumental in teaching the gospel to their children in both word and deed.  A mother testifies of Christ simply by being a mother.  She performs, as Christ did, much of her service without notice or thanks.  In times of turmoil, she protects her children as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings.

The word "Christlike" can mean many things: loving, forgiving, selfless--but perhaps one of the words most nearly synonymous with it is "motherly."

Julie & Julia

Source: SonyPictures.com

On Saturday Julia and I checked out Julie & Julia from the Provo Library.  Julia's a big fan of Julia Child (the Julia in the title) and of good food.  She recommended the movie.

The movie has two parallel storylines.  The first is the life of chef Julia Child.  She and her husband live in Paris in the 50s, when Julia begins learning to cook.  She attends a French cooking class, teaches a cooking class, and, finally, she publishes a cookbook, which is apparently very well-known in the cooking world.

The second story is Julia Powell's.  She lives in New York with her husband in the early 2000s.  She is frustrated with her job and life in general.  Cooking is her release when she comes home from work.  So she decides to do a blog to give her life more purpose.  Her goal is to do all 524 recipes in Julia Child's famous cookbook in only 365 days.

The movie cuts back and forth between the two stories showing the parallels.  It's a good mix of drama, romance, and comedy.  I enjoyed watching it.  There's an f-word later in the movie, but there isn't too much objectionable material.  It inspired me to want to do something cool!  And to learn how to cook.

TED Talk: How to Succeed

When I'm doing work that permits it I like to listen to or watch interesting things: documentaries, TED Talks, General Conference talks, interesting podcasts (news, language, history, etc.), or online classes.  Today I watched a TED Talk that I really liked.

It's by a guy named Tai Lopez, and he talks about a lot of really great things.  He emphasizes the importance of mentors.  One thing I like is that he took initiative in finding his mentors.  He knew whom he wanted for a mentor, and he went and talked to him or her.  He didn't let fear stop him.  Also, he went out of his way to learn new things.  Instead of letting his lack of knowledge become an obstacle, he turned it into a strength and gained the knowledge through hard work.  And he talks a lot about how important reading is, and I'm always happy when people say good things about reading.  I really like how he hammers home the point that we need to work for the success we want.  A lot of people want the end result without the work, and that's not the way things work.  The video is just under twenty minutes long.  Watch and learn!

Celebrity Quotes

Do you ever wonder where all those quotes come from?  Where did Mark Twain go when he penned a particularly pithy phrase?  What about Benjamin Franklin?  Did he just print a section of his own quotes with his annual farmer's almanac?  Perhaps a modern example: Vince Lombardi.  He probably did interviews--that might account for some quotes.  But I've always wondered how these people get their quotes out there.

I've decided that I want to have some good quotes ready, and maybe someday I will be famous enough for them to mean something.  I don't know how others do it, but I'll just start out by sharing mine here.  The other day I was pondering what I want to do with my life, and this gem came to me:

"I may not know what I want, but that sure isn't going to stop me from getting it."

I think it explains quite well a part of my personality--I can be very determined and driven towards a goal--but so often I have a hard time deciding which goals I really want.  So there's my oh-so-clever celebrity-to-be quote of the day.

"The Weight of Glory"

"The Weight of Glory" was originally a sermon, but C.S. Lewis later published it.  I first heard of it a couple years ago when two people independently mentioned it to me within a week of each other.  I thought that was a good sign I ought to read it.  Since then I've looked for it in libraries and online a few times.  Each time I've been unable to find it, or it fades into the background of my never-ending to-do list.  But today I finally found a PDF copy online.  Here it is:

"The Weight of Glory"

It's an excellent essay on what "glory" really means to Christians.  His views are quite close to LDS views.  He talks about some of the different definitions of glory and what they mean for us now and in the afterlife.  The last section in particular is fraught with great material.  I just posted a quote on facebook from that section.  The whole thing is only nine pages, but read carefully.  It's good stuff.  Enjoy!

Your New Favorite App: OverDrive

I know you all like reading, so this post is very good news for you.  There is an app called OverDrive that lets you connect to your public library both on the computer and on a mobile device.  Download the app, then put in your library card number (I think you also need to create an OverDrive account).  It will give you access to Southfield Library's collection, which you can get for free!  Once you check a book out, you can download it a few different formats.  I have the Kindle app for my phone and for Google Chrome, so I download the Kindle version of the e-book.  Then I can read on my phone or on my computer.

I still prefer a tangible book to a screen, but there are undeniable benefits to this.  You don't have to go anywhere, and you can access a large selection of books.  It's easy and convenient.  Let me know if it works for you.

"Be Ye Separate"

A week or two ago I was reading through Alma 5 copying down all of the questions Alma asks the reader.  I hadn't finished yet, but Mom's email today reminded me to finish up.  As I was reading this morning I came across a phrase I like in verse 57:

And now I say unto you, all you that are desirous to follow the voice of the good shepherd, come ye out from the wicked, and be ye separate

The phrase "be ye separate" stuck out to me.  Especially as one who doesn't enjoy being different or being the center of attention, that can be hard.  Of course, I'm a lot better at it now than when I was in high school.  At least, I think I am.  It's been a long time since I've lived in a largely non-LDS community.  I like to think I would do a better job of being separate now.

But what does separate really mean in this context?  Is it an exhortation to physically be separate from wickedness?  In some cases, I think so.  There are places and settings where we ought not to be, and the best thing to do is to physically separate ourselves from those environments, should we find ourselves in them.  But I think it's also a state of mind.  We need to see ourselves as above the wickedness of the world*.  We need to separate ourselves spiritually as well.  We can't be afraid to be different.  That's far easier said than done, but it's important.

*Above the wickedness does not mean above the wicked.  God loves loves sinners too, and it's a good thing, because we are all sinners.  Just because our sins may not be as severe or as public doesn't mean we're any better.

Note: For those of you who use Windows 8--it can do some cool things.  You can download the Gospel Library app for Windows, and then you can do a split-screen thing.  I was just using it to type up the questions from Alma 5 as I read, and now I'm using it for this blog post.  It's nice because I don't have to keep switching windows.

Gender Ratios

They push marriage an awful lot at BYU. You'd think they'd organize the wards a little better. In my FHE group there are 42 men and 16 women. There are three fhe groups, so if they're about the same, the ward ratio is 126:48--strikingly similar to my roommate's estimate, 110:40. Every ward I've been in since freshman year has been similarly disproportionate.

It's a good thing I'm dating someone already, because my chances are not great here.
#theoddsareneverinmyfavor

(Don't take this post too seriously. I'm just making light of the truly terrible gender ratios in Provo singles wards based on my own and others' experiences.)

Victim Blaming

Victim blaming.  It's kind of a buzzword.  People throw it around when talking about things like modesty, rape, and Charlie Hebdo.

Don't tell girls that their dress controls men's thoughts.
Don't tell girls that they were asking for it when they get raped.
Don't tell Charlie Hebdo not to publish things that make people angry.

It is really important to not blame the victim in situations like these.  Individuals have control over their own thoughts and must take responsibility for them.  A rapist is always at fault, regardless of how the victim is dressed or acting.  Murder is wrong, even if those murdered were being unkind.  Victim blaming is wrong.

So is it wrong to say the following?

Your clothing can affect the thoughts of those around you.
The way you present yourself affects the way others think of you.
The things you say affect how others feel about you.

I don't think so.  Though I think victim blaming is wrong, I think the phrase is overused.  I wouldn't classify the above sentences as victim blaming.  Instead, they are counsel intended to prevent bad things from happening.  It is not the victim's fault when bad things happen, but usually there are things people can do to make becoming a victim less likely.

Examples:
Modesty
Growing up in the Church, young men hear a lot about keeping their thoughts in line.  We are taught to view women as daughters of God, and to keep control of our thoughts.  We are taught to replace the temptations of the adversary that assault us with uplifting thoughts.  And it worked, for me.  Though I am far from perfect, I often find myself automatically averting my gaze or using some other avoidance strategy (and even if I mess up, I feel guilty about it--that's important).  So when I first heard the words "victim blaming" thrown around with modesty, I was confused.  The way I saw it, they talked to us young men about what we could control, our thoughts, and to the young women about what they could control, their dress.  That made sense to me.  They weren't blaming the girls, they were just telling them to do what was within their sphere of control.  For me, asking women to be modest has been more "It makes it easier for me when you dress modestly" than "You need to be modest so my thoughts can be clean."  I think that's the way it should be.  But if women are ever taught that they control men's thoughts, I think that is victim blaming.

Celebrity Photo Leak
A few months ago inappropriate photos of several celebrities were leaked to the media.  They had taken these photos privately, and they were intended for a specific audience.  The leaking and publishing of these photos was certainly a very serious breach of privacy.  I remember reading about another celebrity, a comedian, who tweeted his solution for the leak:

“Celebrities, make it harder for hackers to get nude pics of you from your computer by not putting nude pics of yourself on your computer.”

He was immediately attacked by many and accused of victim blaming.  He deleted the tweet and went on to say that he was joking, and not at all condoning the hacker's actions.  Was it victim blaming?  I don't think so.  Was it kind of a tasteless joke?  Probably.  Just because it's easier to make jokes about celebrities doesn't make it okay.  But I think he's right.

Michael Brown
Michael Brown, victim of the police shooting in Ferguson, didn't deserve to die that day.  Victim blaming might sound like "He had it coming after robbing a store and being belligerent with a police officer."  But that simply isn't fair.  Human lives matter, and even when people do things they shouldn't, they usually don't deserve to die for it (and even if we think they deserve to die for it, they deserve a fair trial first).  But is it victim blaming to say that he put himself in a bad position by committing robbery and by his attitude towards the police?  I don't think so.

Charlie Hebdo
I believe in freedom of speech.  I believe it is essential to a free society.  I don't think that means that everything that can be said ought to be.  I haven't seen pictures of the offending cartoons mocking Muhammad published by the magazine.  I haven't read anything from the magazine either.  But if my understanding is correct, they are rude.  I don't think it's right to make fun of others' religions.  That doesn't at all justify the murder of the offending journalists and cartoonists.  Victim blaming says it was their fault because they published that material.  But I don't think it's victim blaming to say "Maybe you shouldn't publish such inflammatory things."  However, I maintain that they have the right to publish it.  It is unfortunate that there are groups who will take advantage of free speech to spread hate (Westboro Baptist Church, KKK, etc.), but freedom to do good is freedom to do evil.

Conclusion
Remember how we got sent to sit on the stairs when we fought with each other?  Remember complaining?  "But he was wrong!"  "But what she did was worse!"  Remember how Mom and Dad would only talk to us about what we did wrong?  about what we could do differently?  That was them teaching us to worry about what we can control.  We don't blame victims, but we do our best to control what we can--ourselves--to avoid becoming victims to the extent possible.

Happy to hear your comments if you have any!

What is a Successful Mission?

Occasionally people tell stories like the following in talks, Sunday school classes, mission prep classes, or conversations:

"Some people think that their missions are not successful because they didn't baptize very many people. John didn't think he was a successful missionary because he only baptized one person.

"Years later, John was approached by Jack, who had joined the church because he met John when John was a missionary.  Jack went on a mission, baptized people, had four thousand kids and grandkids, and now seven bajillion people are members of the Church.

"So John's mission really was a success."

I thought numbers didn't matter?

I'll get my disclaimer out of the way.  I have no problem with stories like this.  They show how important missionary work is even when it doesn't have immediately apparent results.  Stories like this give people like me, who had relatively little success numbers-wise, hope that our efforts will have grander results over time.  But I think people should be careful about how they frame the meaning of this story.

A missionary is not defined by his or her success as determined by statistics.  The final section of chapter one of Preach My Gospel lists what success truly is.  Success is personal commitment, service, and love.  Those are things that each missionary is in control of.  When the story is presented the way I presented it above, it comes out like, "Numbers on your mission don't define success.  They become bigger numbers later on, and that's success."

I'm not mad when I hear this--I didn't even think of this until today.  But now that I'm aware, and I've made you aware, please be careful in how you speak about a missionary's success.  You can ask about baptisms.  I like to get an idea of how many baptisms people get around the world.  It's interesting.  You can tell stories like this and hear stories like this and be uplifted.  However, to the extent that you control it, please try not to equate numbers, whether current or future numbers, with success.